I’m no professional in this area but I completely disagree that orgasms are at the root of deteriorating relationships.
From a lifetime of watching friends, family and my own experiences, there seem to be three main ones: 1) having sex with people you don’t love or care about (or them you) and 2) throwing all your cards too fast ie doing allllll the hot positions as fast as they can be done (like porn) and 3) focusing on orgasm versus connection.
Blaming orgasms for diminishing love/desire is absurd. However, HOW we go about those orgasms is another thing entirely.
The hottest sex I’ve ever had was connected sex. It wasn’t about the positions or how long it lasted or anything material like that. It’s two people who genuinely love and trust one another coming together to express that love.
It’s about what’s most important that is overlooked far too easily these days.